Thursday, October 30, 2014

Non Member Family and Temple Marriage: How to Deal

















Like most other converts, I have family that aren't members of the church. It can be a challenge sometimes, when your parents or extended family question the choices your making and can't understand the many sacred ordinances of the church. One of the most sensitive, I find, is the issue of temple marriage. As members of the church we reserve the right to enter into the Lord's house. We know the the significance of the temples and the meaning of the covenants we make in them. It can be hard for those outside the church to understand why they aren't invited to watch these sacred ordinances with their child. This issue can cause rifts in the family and a lot of hurt feelings all around. I have come up with a few ways to combat this and perhaps increase the understanding of the non members in the family unit.

1. Teach a lesson on the temple: One of the best ways to promote understanding among non-member family is by teaching them what you know about the importance of the temple. You can explain to them that a temple sealing is not like a normal marriage and is not something they would recognize or feel comfortable witnessing. It is a cultural religious ceremony that is privy only to those that have gone through that ceremony before. Once they understand that they aren't missing out on any thing that they would know or recognize they may be more accepting of the fact that they aren't allowed to watch.
2. Have a ring ceremony: Having a ring ceremony is a great way to include your non member family, especially if you're like me and your whole family is non members. Even though it's not the actual act that is legally binding you as man and wife, you still get the experience of a wedding ceremony and everyone can be included. This doesn't have to be an expensive endeavor, and it will give great comfort to your family members that don't have temple recommends.
3. Invite them to the Visitors Center: Another way to help your family understand the temple more is to take a trip to the Visitors Center. Everyone is welcome there and they can learn all about the importance of the temple and feel the spirit that being on temple grounds has to offer. They can look at temple history and have interactive learning experiences with you. There are also missionaries there that are happy to teach and bear their testimonies of the importance of the temple.
4. Have them listen to the prophet speak about the temple: There is no one who can speak about the temple better than the President Monson. He knows the temple on its most intimate levels. There are no limits to the things that he knows about the temple. The spirit that abides when the prophet speaks about the temple is so strong that it cannot be ignored, even by those who don't understand. Pull up a conference talk where President Monson discusses the importance of the temple and watch with them, so that you can answer any questions they may have after the talk.

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